FE6-7: Reason for Existence
by bbqberticus
Summary: Roy is normally a cheerful, optimistic little boy. However, one evening, he takes a very dramatic turn. Eliwood is left trying to comfort an absolutely inconsolable child. (Post FE7, pre FE6. Ninian as Roy's mother.)


_I've been playing Fire Emblem Heroes so much lately, and getting a new, super adorable version of Roy is not helping with my addictive tendencies. I've been trying desperately to get a good version of Eliwood to boost to 5-star so I can have a Roy-Eliwood-Ninian team... Come home, high-quality Eliwood!_

 _Anyway, because I'm currently obsessed, I wrote a little snippet of my favorite father-son duo. I love them to pieces... Particularly Roy. He really needs more hugs._

 _Thanks for reading! Please enjoy~_

* * *

 **Reason for Existence**

Eliwood finished signing an assortment of documents, then set his quill aside and leaned back in his seat. Late afternoon sunlight poured over his desk, warm and relaxing. Birds sang cheerfully outside, and more than a little he wanted the opportunity to flee his responsibilities. Freedom and outdoors certainly held more appeal than the piles of paperwork on his desk.

It had been many years since he had taken his father's position, but he still sometimes questioned his effectiveness in his role as Marquess of Pherae. His mother supported him a great deal as he took over, but Eliwood suspected he could never truly fill his father's shoes.

Unrest continued to grow in Bern, and minor tensions frequently arose in Lycia. Their continent was wavering along a very fine line between peace and war. Not only was it an unfortunate time to take over a noble house, but Eliwood had more personal matters troubling him as of late. Little more than a month earlier, his greatest source of support and encouragement was lost to him; his wife Ninian had passed away.

Leading in such dire times was difficult enough, but doing so after such a loss was near impossible. That day one month earlier, Eliwood had felt like a part of his very self had died. To make matters worse, their young son Roy did not seem to understand the loss of his mother. He laughed and played as he always did, and every day, he would ask why his mother was not there to play with him, would ask when she was returning home.

It never got easier for Eliwood to explain that Ninian was not coming back.

As he pondered his responsibilities and considered escaping for a night in town, Eliwood heard a commotion from elsewhere in the castle. It was distant at first, and he thought it might be the knights going through training exercises. After all, he did hear armor clanking and boots stomping. He straightened in his seat when he heard shouting, and then he rose when a high-pitched cry arose above the rest. The sounds drew nearer until the pattering of small feet and clanking armor were right at his door.

To Eliwood's surprise, Roy burst into the office, running to his father's side. The little boy was bright red and on the verge of tears, sniffling and trying his hardest not to cry. Roy grabbed Eliwood's pant leg, holding so tightly that his father considered they were under attack. Then, an older knight rushed into the office, followed by several younger knights. All were breathless, having been given quite the chase. A couple maids followed shortly thereafter, whispering among themselves.

"Young master Roy," began Marcus, the elder knight of the group. He coughed into his hand and stood straight in the presence of his lord. Eliwood, meanwhile, set his hand on Roy's head. "You mustn't disturb your father while he is working. You—"

"No!" screamed Roy very adamantly, holding his father's clothing more tightly than before.

"We have already prepared a bath for—" started one of the servant girls, to which Roy also adamantly screamed _no_.

"Roy," Eliwood pet his son's hair, then began to usher him back towards the adults chasing him. Roy shook his head and moved out of his grasp, clinging to his other leg instead.

"No!" Roy said, then again for good measure.

"Master Roy," Marcus tried again, more firmly than before. When he stepped forward, Roy shook his head, clung harder to his father, then repeatedly screamed _no_ as desperately as he could. The knight continued, though a bead of sweat ran down his face. "Your father must attend to his work." Roy continued to yell at him, and Marcus continued to approach, undaunted. "You mustn't be disruptive. You will do well to learn from your father's—"

Roy yelled one last time, and then took his shoe off and threw it at the approaching knight. It hit Marcus' armored shin and then pattered to the floor without any grand effect. Wide eyes, gasps and stunned silence were the immediate responses he received, and so Roy recoiled at once. Eliwood exhaled sharply and then frowned down at the child cowering behind his leg.

"Roy," he began, very sternly. "That is not good behavior. You do not treat others that way, for any reason." Crouching so that he could be at his son's level, he took hold of Roy and ushered the boy forward, forcing him to face Marcus. As he did so, Roy began shaking his head again. Nevertheless, Eliwood held him forward and said, "You need to apologize."

"No," Roy insisted, though this time his voice cracked and his lower lip quivered. He gave one look at Marcus and his discarded shoe, choked back a sob, and then he wriggled from his father's hands long enough to turn and wrap both arms tightly around Eliwood's neck.

Roy began to cry, choking on his sobs and attempting to stifle them, though not with much success. At first, he clung to the back of Eliwood's shirt, wringing the fabric, and then he moved one hand up and fingered Eliwood's hair the way he used to do as a toddler whenever he was overly tired and resisting sleep. Eliwood remembered it vividly because Roy used to pull Ninian's hair and make her pout.

Sighing, Eliwood wrapped his arms around his child and offered an apologetic look to Marcus and the others.

"I apologize, Marcus," he insisted. He would absolutely be having a chat with his son later on and have him apologize, but now seemed not to be the time. There was no consoling the little boy in his arms at present.

"I can take him back—" Marcus started, and at once, Roy shook his head again and whimpered _no_ , though this time more as a desperate plea than a demand. His grip around Eliwood's neck tightened, and the small child began to try to lift himself up in a vain effort to force his father to carry him. Eliwood patted Roy's back and steadied himself.

"It's alright," answered Eliwood, honestly. He had been looking for a distraction anyway, but he did not mention that to the others. "You can leave him with me."

"Are you sure, Milord?" Marcus asked, scratching the back of his head.

"Yes." Eliwood tried to peel Roy off of him, but his child held fast. He sighed and patted Roy's back again. "Roy, if something is the matter, you need to use your words. I do not like this behavior." Once again, the child only shook his head in response and continued to silently cry on his shoulder. Eliwood nodded at the others. "You can go. Sorry for the trouble. I will have words with him later."

"Milord." Marcus and the others bowed respectfully and then retreated. As they shuffled out and the door shut, Roy's hold lightened, but only a little.

Eliwood inhaled slowly and considered what to do with the little boy sobbing on his shoulder. It was very unlike Roy to be disrespectful or tearful, and now he was both in one sad little mess. Eliwood slid his hand up the back of Roy's shirt and touched bare skin, expecting a fever but feeling nothing out of the ordinary. With the boy's behavior, it surprised him that he was not unwell.

"What do you say you and I turn in early tonight?" Eliwood asked in a soft tone, lifting his child and standing. Roy continued to cry, and so his father pet his hair and rubbed slow, small circles over his back. "We can read a few stories you like. What do you think?"

Roy did not answer. Eliwood put out his lamp and exited the office with his child still sobbing in his arms.

* * *

After having collected clothing for Roy and a few storybooks, Eliwood brought his son with him to his room to spend the night. Eliwood managed to set Roy down long enough for him to get them both changed into proper nightwear, and only with the promise that he would hold him again the moment he was finished. All the while, his hapless child did not stop crying, rubbing his eyes as though in desperate need of sleep. After changing and getting everything to its proper place, Eliwood scooped Roy up again and climbed into bed with him.

Roy was not about to let him have his own space; the boy held fast to his father's neck and continued sobbing into his shoulder. Eliwood sighed and eyeballed one of the storybooks on his bedside table, wondering if he would ever have the opportunity to read it or if Roy would cry himself to sleep first. His night shirt was already wet with tears, and he could feel Roy's heart beating wildly against his chest. It really was a wonder to him that Roy was not ill. And then, Roy spoke up amidst his sobbing and panting, his voice weak and words labored.

"I miss mommy."

Eliwood's entire world fell apart. He sat in stunned silence briefly as the words sank in, and then he himself had to swallow a lump in his throat. He wrapped both arms around his child, his eyes stinging, and then he kissed Roy on the head. Finally, the defiance and trembling little body and ceaseless tears made perfect sense.

"I miss her, too," he responded, petting Roy's hair back several times before holding his son as tightly as he could, rocking him back and forth.

They had always anticipated this—Ninian knew she would not live long in Eliwood's world. However, that knowledge could never prepare him for this. His son missed his mother, and there was nothing he could do. He was powerless to bring her back, and he was powerless to put an end to his child's tears.

Eliwood's chest ached.

"Are you going away, too?" Roy managed to ask between stifled sobs. Eliwood immediately shook his head and tried to hold his child closer.

"No," he answered, stroking Roy's hair back. He kissed him again, then rested his cheek on the boy's head. "No, I'm not going anywhere."

Roy sniffled and turned his head, pressing his forehead against Eliwood's chin. The little boy trembled and choked back a sob. "Promise?"

Eliwood exhaled slowly, though his breathing labored. The last thing he wanted to do was tell his child a lie. With the threat of war and the continent in ever-increasing peril, how could he promise such a thing? As a warrior and leader, it was his responsibility to fight should the need arise. There was never a guarantee of return.

Still, how could he say otherwise? How could he not return? Ninian was gone—he was all Roy had left. He _had_ to return, because his son needed him. Regardless of the circumstances, that is what he decided in his heart.

"I promise," he said, kissing Roy on the forehead. Roy sniffled again and then patted Eliwood's face. The little boy propped himself up a bit and turned his head to one side. His eyes were puffy and full of tears, and his eyelids were heavy. Once again his lower lip quivered.

"Are you crying, too?"

Eliwood touched his own face and felt wetness streaking his cheeks. He brushed away tears and chuckled a little, brushing Roy's matted hair back and out of his face. Crying had done a number on the child. "Yes. Is it okay if we cry together?" Roy had to think about it for a moment, for he had never really been around to see his father in tears. After some consideration, he nodded and curled back up on Eliwood's chest, safe and secure in his father's arms.

Roy did not start crying again. Rather, he lay perfectly still and listened to his father's rhythmic heartbeat. Eliwood stroked his son's head and back until finally, at long last, the little boy's eyelids fluttered, and then he fell asleep.

Eliwood held Roy long after he had fallen asleep. For a long while, all he could think was that his son needed him to live, to be healthy and to be strong. Never more than in that moment did he feel so strongly as such. Yet as he felt his child's heartbeat against his chest, felt the boy's breathing soften as he slept, he realized something else.

Never more than in that moment had he realized how much he needed Roy, too. Eliwood had lost his father and inherited his realm, and he would live and die for Pherae. However, after Ninian's death, he had been shaken. It felt as though his very existence had been stripped from him, leaving him an empty shell, like a ghost wandering in their world.

Not so now.

It was for his son that he would remain strong. Roy was his reason for being, for continuing on such a difficult path when it seemed like everything was falling apart. After all, Roy was the precious gift Ninian had given to him; he was a part of her, too. Ninian would always live on through their son.

Eliwood exhaled slowly. After turning out the lamp on his bedside table, he relaxed in bed, pulling the blankets around himself and his child. Moonlight streamed in through the curtains he had forgotten to close, but it mattered little. Warmth stirred in his chest as he watched his sleeping child. Eliwood smiled very faintly before kissing Roy on the head one last time. Then, he closed his eyes and went to sleep.


End file.
